Thursday, July 26, 2012

Daddy's little Girl

"Forgive me for i envy the little princess walking hand and hand with her father; her father who walks her into school when she is tardy and kisses her upon her forehead when she's sleeping, holds her close when she's had a bad dream.
Forgive me , Forgive me I say; for it is not this Little girl's fault my father caused me such dismay.
As I walk into stores I see the father's with their little girls, the look in their eyes are priceless. The little girl stares at him as if her daddy is all that matters to her, and he stares at her with promises to protect her forever and never to leave her side no matter who her mother was or what she could've done. None of that mattered to him ; only thing that mattered was the love between father and daughter which they both felt within.
I tried to be a daddy's girl but mommy wouldn't let me, away from daddy she kept me, she told me she was only trying to "Protect me".
But mommy was wrong and daddy was too, he let mommy win the battle he didn't even come back for a round 2. After round one he was done and didn't come back for me, he didn't call, didn't come visit no nothing. I didn't hear from daddy until i was 18 by then It was too late he had missed everything, my first prom, my first boyfriend, my ring dance, my honor awards ceremonies he missed it all. But for some reason when we finally re-united again none of that bothered me at all. It was almost as if i was suffering from amnesia , only I remembered when he left and didn't come back but standing in front of him listening to him apologize how could I still be mad at that? "Forgive me" he asked and forgave him I did what good would it do me holding onto pain from when I was a kid?
I do not envy those little girls anymore when I see them in stores because I got my father back, and so much more.

"What's your FAME"?

"I Don't wanna be that girl whose famous for being "the hottest girl next door". "I don't wanna be that girl whose famous for being a whore. "I don't want to gain fame by videotaping my sex game screaming some random dude's name and messing up my own name before I really even get a shot at fame. "I don't wanna gain fame by selling my soul for eternity in exchange for ten years of celebrity certainty, I'm sure there's more to gain by seeking fame the right way. "I don't want to gain fame being facebook famous, taking pictures in my bathroom mirror showing every female attribute I have hoping to check my notifications and to find a million comments & a million likes after only 30 seconds of posting it..... "I don't want followers by having a sexually explicit twitter name and tweet about nothing but twitter fame..... "I don't want to gain fame because I'm related to someone thats famous, noone really accepts you because your a famous sibling they just tolerate you really. " I Don't want to gain fame because I slept with someone famous and wrote a book about and gained One book writer fame ". " I don't wanna gain fame because I have the biggest boobs or the biggest butt, thats not enough after awhile those things wither away and once society realizes your getting plastic surgery to keep yourself relevant, you then become irrelevant. "I don't wanna gain fame because I know "what's his name" and he knew "what's her name" but nothing ever happened at the "whatchamacalit" so I lost that chance at fame". "I don't wanna gain fame because I know how to fight and can display it on relatiy tv. for the world to see hoping that I will be recognized on the streets for my big show down on national T.V." "I don't want to gain fame by having a million guys sign up to seek the love of me and have all of them fighting over me, while gaining ratings on tv. because after a few seasons of that noone will remember me". "I don't wanna gain fame because I was the half naked girl in the back of a music video that I did for free and after it was over still noone recognized me because I wasn't "popping" enough to be put in the main scenes". "I don't want to be model profile famous where I have to pay a fee for a website to hopefully be able to help me be famous in a year but as a year goes by so does my money and from noone I hear". " I don't want to gain stupid fame, for being the biggest loser, or being the fattest/ unhealthiest woman in the world having everyone in America watching me hurl and cry because I can't lift one of my thighs. I don't wanna be teen mom famous where I gain a chance on tv for letting some dude plant one in my ovaries &then we break up and thats the end of him, me, and my tv show pregnancy. "I dont wanna gain fame by jumping of the highest building with no parachute expecting to live, no I don't want that kind of fame. "I want the I have "Raw talent" fame. and people want to work with me because of that I want the everlasting fame not the get rich quick cut throat fame...... I want the fame that when people see me they recognize me for the good not the bad and the ugly...... "I want the fame of when I'm gone, people still and will always remember my name because I sought out for fame, The right way." -Tianaforthought*